What Will Therapy Be Like?
There’s no single, definitive answer to this question. Therapy is a very individual journey, and everyone will have a different experience.
It’s normal to feel a bit apprehensive or nervous about starting therapy for the first time. Even if you consider it a positive step towards changing your circumstances or working on a problem, not knowing what you’re walking into can be daunting. Although I can’t tell you exactly what therapy will be like for you, I can explain some of the process and share what to expect at your first therapy session.
Finding the Right Therapist
Before we dive into what therapy entails, I want to emphasise the importance of finding the right therapist. There are also lots of different therapeutic approaches and the type you select can determine your overall experience of therapy.
For these reasons, it’s a good idea to shop around, do your research, and find someone you think you’ll gel with. Most therapists offer an introductory consultation call so you can make an informed decision and be sure they’re a good fit for your needs.
Your First Therapy Session Explained
Step 1. Your Therapy Assessment
Usually, therapy starts with an assessment. This is an opportunity for you and your therapist to establish the type of therapy you need and the best approach.
Sometimes, people already know what type of therapy they’re looking for. It might have been recommended by another healthcare professional, or they might have researched it extensively and chosen the approach they feel will be most useful. However, in my experience, the majority need some guidance as they begin their therapy journey.
During your assessment, you’ll be asked to help the therapist understand the nature of your difficulties and how they’re affecting you. You’ll discuss any relevant history and past experiences that have contributed to the problems, any issues related to safety, and your individual goals for therapy. Armed with this information, your therapist will be able to suggest the most suitable approach to help resolve the problems you’re experiencing.
Step 2. Introduction to Therapy
Following your assessment, your therapist will give you an introduction to the type of therapy you’ve selected together. This might involve explaining some of the key concepts and mapping out your problems so you can understand them within the specific therapy model.
At this point, you and your therapist will usually agree certain logistical elements such as the length of sessions, how often you’ll meet, how you’ll communicate between sessions, and any expectations of one another.
There should be plenty of opportunities to ask questions. For example, in my practice I ask my clients for feedback at the beginning and end of each session. They’re free to clarify things we’ve covered and discuss anything about the therapy process that feels unclear.
Step 3. Building a Therapeutic Relationship
Throughout the process so far, you and your therapist will be getting to know one another and building trust. Your therapist will also be working hard to make sure you feel safe and comfortable.
This is what we call the ‘therapeutic relationship’ – a very specific type of relationship that exists between a therapist and a client. It can feel like a very close relationship because you’re sharing lots of personal information, but the therapist’s role within it is to remain professional while being kind and caring. The therapeutic relationship is collaborative, meaning both the therapist and the client contribute in different but equal ways.
What to Expect During and After Therapy
It’s normal to experience lots of different emotions in therapy. For some people, this isn’t a big deal. They’re used to expressing emotions, crying in front of people, and voicing their worries and fears.
For others, this can be an unfamiliar experience that makes them feel uncomfortable at times. It’s the therapist’s job to create a space where it feels safe to talk about difficult things and difficult emotions. If it’s something you aren’t used to doing, you should be supported to start gently and explore your emotions in a graded way, so it doesn’t feel too overwhelming.
It's also normal to be quite tired after therapy. Some people feel emotionally drained and need to focus on taking care of themselves after each session.
How to Get the Most Out of Therapy
Therapy can be life changing. It’s important to approach it with an open mind. Even if therapy has not been helpful in the past, it doesn’t mean it won’t help you in the present. Be as open and honest as you possibly can.
Come prepared. Think about what you want to talk about and any questions you may have. Consider what you’d like to change through therapy and any specific goals you want to focus on. Be prepared to share feedback with your therapist.
Finally, I consider a therapy notebook essential. I’d encourage you to make notes about each session, keep track of questions and feedback, and generally allow yourself to journal and reflect on what you’re learning through therapy.
Find Out More
If you’re interested in therapy or would like to learn more about how I can help you heal and recover from trauma, please get in touch. Alternatively, subscribe to The Trauma Toolbox to receive my insights and tips straight to your inbox every month. I also share lots of mental health education via Instagram.
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